Funny and Humorous New Year Resolutions

Well, the New Year's Eve comes with new hopes for each one of us. But mind you, life is a 'give and take' sort of business. To achieve something, you need to have a resolution to drive you towards your goal.
| Friday, December 31, 2010
Of all the traditions that are followed on a New Year’s Eve, taking a resolution stands out! That’s because a New Year’s resolution counts upon ones determination to achieve an objective.

For now, keep aside the serious part of resolutions. Here are some funny and humorous New Year resolutions to tingle your laughter cells.

  1. My resolution for the year is to not to take any serious resolution. Can anyone beat that?
  2. I will welcome my wife’s nagging with a broad smile and cry later.
  3. I commit to show up my real hair color and stop using dyes.
  4. I commit to show up my real face and stop using make-up. Producers, can you sign me up for your next horror movie?
  5. I resolve to not to talk bad about my boss with my colleagues. I will say it all face-to-face. Jobs portals, are you hearing me?
  6. I will save my fathers (or husbands) money by spending less cash by using credit cards instead.
  7. I will collect my pet’s hair from every corner of the house, make a soft toy out of it and gift it to my mother.
  8. Ensuring my family that I will give up drinking alcohol and switch to milk.
  9. I am making a promise to my girlfriend of not traveling by flights with beautiful air hostesses.
  10. I will cut down on my E-mail addresses to lower my popularity among friends.
  11. I commit to clean my house and lawn at least once a month to make it a better place to live in.
  12. I will regularly remind myself that I am a diabetic (or obese) and need to cut down on chocolates.
  13. I will try out a new recipe every weekend to surprise my folks and keep a restaurant number in case of any disaster.
  14. I promise not to waste food in my Tiffin by sharing more with friends.
  15. I will work on some innovative and convincing excuses to turn up late on important occasions.
  16. I will not call up call centers just to hear those beautiful voices.
  17. I promise to get married this year so that my would-be wife gets a younger looking husband.
  18. I will stop being superstitious. After all, the black cat also must be going somewhere around and would not deliberately cross my way.
  19. I will stop watching more movies and shift to serials. I cannot live without you dear television!
  20. I will save the world from air pollution by quitting cigarettes. Hey, can anyone introduce an environment friendly cigarette?
  21. I will stop driving till others get used to my style of driving. I want no road mishaps this year.
  22. I will stop telling lies this year onwards but I need an allowance for half-lie at least.
  23. I will stop chatting over messengers and use phone instead. Mom and dad, are you going to object to that as well?
  24. I will relieve people of tolerating my bad breath and brush my teeth regularly.
  25. I will be a strict vegetarian this year. The list of animals getting extinct is increasing!

Taking up a resolution is one easy part and standing by it is a difficult one. So far as your resolutions make somebody laugh go ahead with a funny one this year as well.